The Arrogance of Serenata Flowers

It never fails to amaze me sometimes how some firms ever manage to stay in business. I’m not talking about problems with cash flow, which affects all businesses at one time or another. No. I’m talking about the cavalier way in which they treat their customers, expecting them to return to use their abysmal services, as if they have a god-given right to assume that their business will carry on regardless of how bad the service is that that they offer.

 

A classic case in point is Serenata Flowers - http://www.serenataflowers.com – whose corporate arrogance beggars belief.

 

 

Serenata Flowers is a sister site of Serenata Wines, Serenata Chocolates, Serenata Hampers and Serenata Plants.

 

 

Their web site sounds enticing (even if their grammar is appalling!): “London florist Serenata Flowers delivers beautiful fresh flowers in the UK. As an independent florist, we cut out middlemen and offers cheaper flowers by buying flowers direct from the best growers and flower auctions around the world. Our flowers are fresher that what you will find in traditional flower shops in the UK, since we buy flowers internationally delivered to the UK and shipped out via our Free flower delivery service the same day.” (sic)

 

As an afterthought, it adds “For last minute flower deliveries we have partnered with local florists throughtout England, Scotland and Wales to offer same-day flower delivery” (sic)

 

On the web site it also lets you know that Orders placed within a certain time frame will be accepted for the following day…

 

… while they also give a “guarantee” that they will deliver on time, every time

 

 

As I wanted to send some flowers to someone with a 60th birthday in two days time I decided to try them out giving a full 48 hours notice. Unfortunately, the web site crashed twice as I was placing the order, and also “decided” to include a paid-for card when I had not checked the paid card check box. I wrote to them:

 

Hi - your web site has been really bad this evening and has twice forced me to return to the very beginning of the order process. I did NOT want a paid-for card, and although I checked the free card box, it still added a paid for card. Please will you amend this order to include only a free card and not a paid-for card. Thank you.

 

I received a reply from Lily Calyx, Serenata’s Head of Customer Services, saying “Further to your recent contact with us regarding order Q3854996 in which you informed us that you wished to change the products in the order, we wish to inform you that we have organised a refund of £2.99 back to the payment method used when placing the order. Please note that it may take 1-3 days for the refund to show on your statement.

 

“Please do not reply to this email as it has been sent from an unattended email account. To contact us, please login to your account via http://www.serenataflowers.com/login.asp or use our contact form at http://www.serenataflowers.com/contactpage.asp?ticketID=E45EE07C-F0CD-4516-982D-4B9B6D57FA1B.”

 

All well and good, you would think … except that when I clicked on that link above it took me to correspondence between Serenata and another of its customers who was complaining about late delivery. (It’s no use trying to click on that URL now as Serenata removed the page after I complained about their “security”!) So much for their Security and Privacy promise!

 

 

As I hadn’t heard anything from the intended recipient two days after the flowers should have arrived, I decided to check Serenata’s web site, where they have a tracking facility. 

 

 

What’s this? The “parcel” is still in the depot ready for dispatch? I wrote to them immediately:

 

“Just what is going on with your web site? I placed this order to arrive on January 26th but STILL your site [on the 28th] says the order is at the depot awaiting delivery! Please CONFIRM that these flowers were delivered on the date specified and which I paid for. I am in Beijing, China, and have relied on you to carry out this order properly but I have had nothing but problems with your web site. Can you please tell me what time of days these flowers were delivered?”

 

Exactly one hour and 45 minutes later, Franny Cook from Customer Services Admin replied:

I can confirm that your bouquet was delivered on 28/01/13 at 15:05. Please accept our sincere apologies for the late delivery of your flowers on such an important occasion. As the flowers arrived late we would like to offer a 20% discount off of a future order. Simply use the voucher code ’##### [number hidden]’ when you place your next order.

 

Were they trying to be funny? Did they honestly think that I would be using their service again when they had failed to honour their contract the first time around? I wrote back again…

 

This is simply NOT GOOD ENOUGH!!!! You failed to deliver on a very important occasion and to expect me EVER to use your abysmal service again just beggars belief! I am absolutely furious. Your web site stated categorically that you would deliver on the 26th. And it took a complaint from me to actually trigger some action from you guys to deliver it at all - two days late! This is absurd. Kindly rebate the 20% off what you have already charged me straight away and stop this nonsense. I am absolutely disgusted!

 

This time Hannah Mills in Customer Service Admin wrote back: “Please be advised, we have recieved (sic) a response from the couriers: Good Afternoon,Thank you for your enquiry. Unfortunately due to the extreme weather we had Friday night, Saturday morning, the driver was unable to deliver this, it has however been delivered today. We do apologise for any frustration and upset caused on this occasion.”

 

Just a moment though… doesn’t their web site state categorically that “we cut out middlemen”? So what are couriers if not middle men?

 

And sure, there had been snow that weekend; but it hadn’t stopped my daughter being able to drive some 200 miles to get there. I wrote back again:

 

You are now adding insult to injury. The fact that my daughter was able to drive all the way from the Midlands to this address for a family reunion on the 26th shows that the roads were passable and your courier company is not telling the truth. Your company entered into a contract to deliver the flowers on the Saturday morning. You failed to do so. Worse still you didn’t even let me know. Neither did any action even start to be taken until after I had contacted you on the Monday afternoon UK time ... it was midnight here in Beijing … asking what was going on. I now repeat - I expect you to make compensation for the embarrassment caused me and the fact that you failed to honour your contract. If I have to escalate this believe me I will do so. Do not fob me off with excuses. I want to know what you now intend to do to bring this miserable episode to a conclusion.

 

Mark Davis, their Customer Service Manager now took up the baton …

Thank you for your email Apologies for any upset or embarrassment caused. As advised by my colleague, this was delivered late due to the bad weather that we experienced and unfortunately this is something that was out of our control. We appreciate that some of the roads in the area we accessable [sic], however some of the roads were very icy and as a result of this the driver was not able to make any deliveries that day. As stated in our terms and conditions, we are unable to offer any form of refund or resend due to the non-delivery as this was out of our control and cannot accept any responsibility for this inconvenience.

 

Yet again, your favourite blogger wrote back…

“When you took my money you confirmed delivery on January 26th. And your web site states categorically "Our Guarantee - the freshest flowers guaranteed delivery on time, every time". It was only on the Monday afternoon AFTER I had complained that your team should get off its collective backside to send out the delivery that you made any effort to deliver, even though I now understand the roads were perfectly clear in the morning. Your website also goes on to say "Our Guarantee - If you are not 100% happy with your Serenata experience, we will offer you a full refund or replacement..." Well I am certainly  NOT 100% happy so please organise a full refund without any further delay.”

 

Note that wording of theirs – not we MIGHT offer… but we WILL offer.

 

 

But this time Faith J wrote back… “We do understand your frustration, however the issue may have been enroute to your recipient that the weather had affected the roads for delivery, rather than the roads near to your recipients address.” Errr… can you say that in English, please, Faith?  “…during adverse weather conditions … we cannot accept responsibility for the late delivery of the order. Therefore, in the event of adverse weather conditions, we aren’t able to refund or offer re-delivery of affected orders.”

 

She also manages to avoid the fact that along with all the other “guarantees” on their web site it states categorically “in the event of non-delivery on the selected delivery date, we will either refund you in full or redeliver your order – it is your choice, just let us know.”

 

So, dear blog readers; where we are at the moment is a stand off with Serenata basically saying “Get lost dear customer. We have your money and you can carry on singing for it.”

 

But those of you who know me well know that I will not give up. I intend to post this account on my Blogger pages which typically get around 300 regular readers every week. I will inform Serenata of the URL so they too can enjoy reading all about themselves.

 

If I get no satisfaction from them, it will then be posted on my main web site which gets around 3,000 visitors every week. Failing that too, it will then get onto Facebook… well, you get the idea…

 

Oh, and dear Serenata customer service agents, you might care to know I am a journalist and I have a track record of embarrassing companies such as yours into starting to give real customer service rather than trying to hide behind the small print (which in the case of your web site you conveniently hide on your Help page).

 

I will of course continue to give you, my blog fans, full up to date coverage of how this develops.

 

Oh, and as of the time of writing, Serenata's tracking service still says that the flowers are in the depot!

 

 

Addendum 1. - 31/01/2013
Five days after the flowers should have arrived and three days after they did arrive, Serenata's web site still lists them as arriving in the local depot ready for dispatch!

Addendum 2. - 31/01/2013
Message from Katie Upton in Customer Service Admin: Dear Brian, Thank you for your email. Unfortunately we are unable to view the link as security setting will not allow us to, if you could please forward your comments to us directly we will do our best to assist you.

Oh what a shame! I will write to them again, this time with the link to both web sites that currently carry this blog entry!

Addendum 3. - 31/01/2013
My reply to Serenata: "What a shame about your security settings. I would suggest that now as well as yesterday's blog entry:
 http://gorgeousbrian.blogspot.com/2013/01/serenata.html
you also try to get in to:
http://www.simbacom.com/brian/blogs/serenata.html

Of course, you could hide once again behind your security settings, but this episode is not going to go away!

In the meantime, as per your web site's advice: "Our Guarantee - If you are not 100% happy with your Serenata experience, we will offer you a full refund or replacement..."
(Please note the wording: not we MIGHT offer… but we WILL offer)
So as you know I am very unhappy with what has gone on, I would now like to claim a full refund for this order. I await your reply.

Addendum 4 - 31/01/2013
One of my blog fans informs me that she was so insensed by this blog that she wrote to Serenata's web site to complain of their poor service! Thanks Suzie. Much appreciated!

Addendum 5 - 01/02/2013
Lily Calyx picked up the baton one final time: "Further to your recent contact with us regarding order Q3854996 in which you informed us that your order was delivered unacceptably late, we wish to inform you that due to the 100% satisfaction guarantee, that we have organised a refund back to the payment method used when placing the order. Please note that it may take 3-5 days for the refund to show on your statement. We would like to take this opportunity to apologise for the poor experience and inconvenience caused."
Bravo Lily! Finally common sense prevails. I won't now be leaving polite messages on your FaceBook page; nor will I be posting comments about you on my FB page either.
Herewith the matter rests!

Oh, and your web tracker still lists the flowers as being in the warehouse ready for dispatch!

Dubai’s RTA site needs a good kick up the *%^$#@*!, if you ask me

Regular readers of my blog will know that though I think that Dubai has made tremendous advances in its overall passenger transport system in the past couple of years, I am no fan of the Road Transport Authority which runs the service.

I am trying to put myself in the place of the hapless tourists who gullibly swallow the marketing hype of the publicity spinners and book their vacations in this city. How do they cope with getting around – apart from taking taxis to and from every possible location?

This line of thought is especially poignant for me now that I have had to sell my beloved car and travel with the masses using the aforementioned public transport. I decide to do some research to see just how easy it is to get from A to B – bearing in mind the RTA’s slogan of “Moving People” (gad – did someone get paid for thinking up that one; not to mention a subsequent stunner of a one-liner: “Get Around the City at your Convenience”?)

As I have a temporary base in a compound to the south of Ibn Battuta Mall (called Muntaza Compound) I think to myself it could be useful to know how often the local feeder bus route operates so that if I needed to get, say, to the airport, I could let the RTA move me! Ibn Battuta Mall metro station is a mere 18 minute walk away, but in the heat and humidity of Dubai, that is not something to be entertained lightly.

So I log onto the pride of the RTA site – a subsite called Wojhati, or Journey Planner. I tell it that I want to go from Muntaza to the airport. And in no time at all it tells me that I should take a number 99 bus going towards Jebel Ali to reach Ibn Battuta.

Oh dear; we have a problem already. The bus to Jebel Ali has come from Ibn Battuta already. What we actually need is a 99 going towards The Gardens, not Jebel Ali. Zero out of 10 so far! The site also helpfully mentions that the fare to the airport will be AED 4.10 (ie two tier zones). It isn’t. Due to the fact that the bus’s ‘Nol’ electronic fare system is fed by an inaccurately set up GPS system, the overall fare comes in at AED 5.80 – ie three tier zones, where it should only be two.

OK, so I am hardly going to complain at paying 5.80 instead of something approaching 100 in a taxi, but that RTA site still scores a hefty zero in my book. At least it gets the number of the bus right, even if it is going in the opposite direction!

I log on to Dubai Airport’s site – dubaiairportguide.com – and read with interest about the night buses serving the city at half hourly intervals throughout the night. Unfortunately there are no longer any night buses in Dubai – they were discontinued eons ago by the thoughtless bureaucrats who never, it would appear, use public transport themselves.

Those hapless travellers will also need to know that they have to buy “Nol” cards before using any public transport in the emirate. Where to get them though? That is the question faced daily by frustrated visitors. I look up the Dubai Airport site again. Ticket offices are located in the 10 open metro stations, it tells us.

Errrr…. Just a minute. A number of months have now passed since almost all the stations on the red line were (finally) opened – including Airport Terminals 1 and 3. So another zero out of 10 for useful information.

In frustration I eMail the web master of the site – which in fairness has asked for comments from its readers.  Within 16 hours I am sent a reply… “Thank you for contacting Dubai Airport Guide. We aim to reply to all questions or queries as soon as possible and usually within 24 hours. Kind Regards Dubai Airport Guide”

That was three weeks ago. I have stopped holding my breath!

Back to the RTA’s web site for more erudition… But their Dubai bus map is not only of such low resolution that it is almost impossible to read any of the bus routes, but worse, it is of July 2010 vintage – well before the majority of Dubai’s present bus routes were either introduced or changed. Once again zero out of ten.

The metro map is not much better. It may well list the stations on the red line, but calmly tells us that most of these have not yet been opened. Again zero out of ten.

So I turn to the RTA’s very own blog site. “Thank you for your interest in our website,” it purrs. “This page is dedicated to share our experiences related to Dubai bus [no mention of the metro I notice] where we can all share our experiences. Your comments will contribute to this blog’s success.”

I make my contribution, suggesting they update their site. But it turns out the so-called blog is moderated, and again, three weeks later there are no signs of my comments.

I turn to their picture sharing section where I am thrilled to see three pictures of Dubai buses.

 I turn to their video sharing section but as of now no one has thought to share their videos of Dubai’s buses. Shame!

Devastated not to be able to enjoy a video of a Dubai bus, I turn to the rules and regulations section and discover that under the rules of the Metro, one is not allowed to distract the driver while the train is in motion. An interesting thought indeed, given that Dubai is so proud of its driverless trains!

But friendly to the last, the site tells us that the following fines have been put in place to ensure you have a great experience on the metro. Try telling that to the very many tourists who are regularly hauled off the trains for such heinous crimes as drinking water from a bottle, or just chewing gum. I’m not sure they would really describe their experience as a great one.

But looking on the bright side, it also tells us that we must not throw any litter or spit through windows. So that comes as a great relief for all of us.
So, dear tourists – don’t say you have not been warned. Oh, and by the way, you will also most likely have read on numerous web sites that the UAE is famed for its Arab hospitality. But hey – who believes what one reads on the web anyway?

Sorry RTA – you still score zero in my book for your abysmal web and your even more abysmal ‘blog’. But think positive – at least we can all be assured that it can only get better from here on in!

Addendum

It appears that it is not only the RTA's web site that is in urgent need of attention, if the signs at Ibn Battuta Metro station are anything to go by. Want to buy a ticket during the rush hour? Too bad if you want to use the automatic machine...

It is "temporarily out of order". But never mind, we can always go to the ticket office...

Oh shucks... it is closed. But no matter - there are two ticket office booths:

Whoops. There is no one manning the ticket office during the rush hour. But hey, we can always queue up for 15 minutes to buy our tickets at the Information booth opposite.
Want to let your nearest and dearest know you are gonna be a little late due to lack of facilities at the station? Too bad if you haven't got a mobile phone...

But first you have to find any other booths with a working phone (sounds a bit like London's phone boxes doesn't it!). In Ibn Battuta, there are 11 phone stations with no installed phones!
Frustrated with the station facilities and just want to get out - perhaps across the road using the footbridge? Huh! Think again! The station has only been open for some eight months - hardly enough time for the powers that be to get their escalators working, surely?

So admit it! Now you are thoroughly pee'd off? Sorry again. The loo is closed for maintenance...

Else just in case you didn't get the message, your convenience is out of service. Sorry for the inconvenience! :))

Of course this is always assuming you can get INTO Ibn Battuta station in the first place!

Oh, and BTW - is there anyone out there who can explain to me why it costs 1.80 dirhams to go from Ibn Battuta to Muntaza, but 4.10 to go from Muntaza to Ibn Battuta?

Addendum 2

OK, so maybe the powers that be read this blog? Two days after it is posted, I go along to the bus stop at Muntaza and wait for the 99.... and wait.... and wait.... and let me tell you that waiting in 45 degrees for a bus that never comes is not the nicest experience.

Eventually I hail a passing taxi and take it to Ibn Battuta (10Dhs rather than the 4.10 I was complaining about).

I then ring up the RTA's "Help Line" to enquire what has happened to today's 99. Oh hello, Mr Brian, a girl called Sarah answers. Thinks: how does she know who I am? It must have been from when I last rang up the RTA some two years ago. Obviously at least one of their computers works in this place!

I am informed that the 99 bus has been withdrawn from circulation. No announcements on the bus; no notices on the bus stops; just withdrawn. One day it is there. The next day it is not.

I ask why no one in the RTA thinks it is important to let the passengers standing sweltering in the sun know that the bus they are waiting for no longer exists. Not surprisingly Sarah has no answer.

But actually the answer is perfectly clear. It is yet another example of RTA's philosophy of Fuck the Customer - We have a monopoly so see if we care!

Customer service? Oh please - don't make me weep!

Emirates NBD - A case of Incompetence, Stupidity or what, pray tell?

I used to think that Emirates Bank was OK. It gave a fair service and in general was quite reliable when it came to the services it offered. But things have changed recently – at least if the Ibn Battuta branch is anything to go by.

Not once, not twice, but three times in the past two months I have tried paying in a cheque to one of their newfangled electronic automatic pay-in machines – each at a different branch – and each time, having religiously followed the instructions given, I have ended up with the machine swallowing the cheque and then had to run around for about half an hour afterwards trying to get some bored bank official to try and put matters right … which normally took up to three days to do.

This morning I had another cheque to pay in and so decided I would not use one of their auto machines, but instead would use a teller. I went to the Ibn Battuta branch and had to go all the way to the far end of the bank to get a pay-in form which I duly filled in. But now I had to go all the way back to the entrance to get a queuing ticket before going all the way again to the far end to wait for a teller.

They used to have a collection of Filipino and Indian tellers who were pleasant, competent and gave one confidence in their service. Alas no more. Emiratis have taken over and despite the fact there were four people on duty, three of them (the Emiratis) were giggling and gossiping among themselves (at one stage even taking  a look at the ID card of an Indian customer and falling about laughing at his picture – unforgivable IMHO) while the fourth teller – an Indian woman – carried on diligently. So I was not surprised that it took ten minutes of waiting to pay in my cheque.

But what was this? I was told you can no longer pay in a cheque at the teller counter, but that you have to use a machine that stamps a time code onto your paying in slip and then post it into a box. One of the giggling Emiratis took me over to show me (back to the front of the bank once again). She had thoughtfully stapled the cheque to the paying in slip.

See how easy it is, she told me condescendingly.

Excellent, said I; but where do I get a stapler to attach the cheque to the slip?

You ask a teller. They will be happy to help.

So I have to queue up for a teller to ask if they will staple the cheque to the paying in slip so I can then post it in your post box?

Yes…. Or you can use one of the envelopes provided.

But there are no envelopes provided.

In that case you can ask a teller for one.

I left the bank wondering if this is a case of stupidity, incompetence or simply that the bank is having fun at the expense of its customers. Given the behaviour of the Emirati tellers earlier on, I suspect the latter. That, together with a touch of stupidity and incompetence thrown in just to make sure the customer is inconvenienced to the max.

Geez! What a bank! Or for that matter… What a country! How come anyone stays in business over here?

Callserve – No calls and No serve!

Regular readers will know that nothing infuriates me more than companies that feel they can take their customers for a ride. Forget about customer service and actually keeping the guys who pay their bills sweet; instead rape their accounts and smile all the way to the bank.

So Callserve – which makes its money from offering Voice Over Internet phone calls – gets my vote this month for shoddiest customer treatment – way out in front of similar grab-the-money-and-run organisations.

What gets my ire this time around? I live and work in the United Arab Emirates. For quite some time I was a happy and, dare I say it, loyal customer of Callserve. I paid a fee up front which allowed me to make pretty cheap phone calls around the world and in general the software did what it said on the box and everyone was happy. The fact that two years ago there were over 1400 international VoIP services for the residential and SOHO (small business) market didn’t sway me one bit. I saw no reason to change.

But circumstances dictated otherwise. The telecoms regulator in the UAE saw fit to ban the use of VoIP. Try to get onto any of the regular VoIP websites and you were greeted with the screen of death:

خطر!  Surf Safely! This website is not accessible in the UAE.

The page goes on to explain that “the site you are trying to access contains content that is prohibited under the Internet Access Management Regulatory Policy of the Telecommunications Regulatory Authority of the United Arab Emirates.”

Or to put it another way, the impoverished telecoms companies, Du and Etisalat can’t fleece their customers if they resort to trying to save money using VoIP.

And so it was that trying to use Callserve became an impossibility. The general public couldn’t save money by making cheap internet calls; Callserve couldn’t make money by selling cheap internet calls. Only Du and Etisalat were able to carry on making their piles of money.

But wait a minute! What was this? Despite the so-called ban, Skype continued to work after a fashion; and then Yahoo and MSN Messenger’s voice and video conferencing suddenly started working again too for some reason. But the likes of Callserve were still officially banned. And that must have really choked off Callserve who surprise, surprise, suddenly worked out a way of circumventing the regulations.

“Having trouble calling from the UAE? We have a solution,” they trumpeted on 26^th September. “We’ve had feedback from a few customers stating that they are having trouble accessing our PC dialler. If you too are having issues using the regular Callserve PC dialler, then we have a solution. You can download a new version here. We apologise for any inconvenience caused with our PC dialler, and hope to see you calling again soon.” And a specially set up web site at http://uaecaller.com/callserve (UAE Telecoms Regulator, please note!) had this new software which the killjoys at the UAE Regulatory office had not yet discovered and blocked. 

Sure enough, I was once more able to download Callserve software and managed to log on with my old password. But what was this? My balance, which had stood at over £16 when last I had used it, now recorded zero. I started to read the small print. “Your Callserve account was not used for over 6 consecutive months and was therefore closed.  However, our records show that you have recently logged in [to download the new software] so we have reactivated your account.  ...You will need to make a payment as your account balance is now automatically set to zero.”

WHAT???

“It’s worth reminding you that we are giving away 10% extra free credit on all top ups made until the end of September 2010. All you need to do is enter the promotion code SEP10 when you next top up your account,” it added, as if to rub salt in the wound.

Hang on though. This was Callserve’s software that didn’t work here; a problem that they knew about and were able to solve by writing better software. I wrote to their customer support asking for a reinstatement of my money. And I got a reply… a couple of days later from someone called Vishal Tirthani.

“Dear customer, Thank you for contacting Callserve Support. We are really sorry that you were not able to use the callserve service to save on calls since one year.  Unfortunately we cannot do anything about the returning of the credit, as that is a system policy. Please do not hesitate to contact us if you need further assistance.”

In other words, Dear Customer; we have your money. Now get lost!

I wrote back again. “I am sorry that your system policy seems to penalise the end user for the fact that YOUR software doesn't work in the UAE and that when you finally sorted the problem out you expect the CUSTOMER to be happy to wave goodbye to money he paid upfront on the basis that YOUR software would work when in fact it didn't.  Are you guys really serious that this is what customer service is all about? Might I respectfully suggest that you re-examine your ‘system policy’ and make an exception in this case?”

Not surprisingly, Callserve ‘Customer Service’ has chosen not to reply. Now, in my book, this is nothing short of stealing. They promised a service which didn’t work; and when they finally DID get it working, they then zeroed the balance and then had the temerity to ask their customers to pay again, because their system policy was…. to steal from their customers!

So in awarding my shoddiest customer treatment of the month accolade to Callserve, this is just to let them know that I will be telling as many people as possible about their policy of ripping off customers. This blog will also go on my web site. And it will be posted on Facebook. And it will be sent to a number of other bloggers I know in the hope that they too will spread the word that if anyone would like to use VoIP, the LAST company they should ever consider using is Callserve which I understand is also part of Vyke.com. On the basis of viral networking, I would like in my own small way to put a BIG spanner in the works of this rip off company.

Oh, and if Callserve ever do respond to this particular ex-customer, you can rest assured that I will be sure to tell you what they have to say for themselves.

12th November 2010 update:

Oh guess what....The Callserve team really do think they are the bee's knees.... I have just been written to:

Hi brian, Did you know about our great referral scheme? If you refer a friend to Callserve you get $5 free credit when they make their first top up. And they get $5 too! It's that simple. Visit our site for more details.

If you need any help or support please contact our Customer Support Team. Talk soon, The Callserve Team

Being the mean spirited S-O-A-B that I am, I wrote back to them....short and sweet:

Your lack of customer service really astounds me! and then linked them to this page...

A lady called Kiran Shetty (no, I did say Shetty!) wrote back:

Thank you for writing us, Can you be a bit more specific in your query, So that we can serve you in a better manner, {her grammar, not mine!}

I wrote back...

To be dismissed offhand by your customer service and then to be spammed by your marketing department suggesting I recommend Callserve to my friends beggars belief. I will NEVER recommend Callserve to anyone again after such treatment. Instead I will refer everyone to my blog.

I am a journalist and also give training on internet use to businesses. One of the points I always stress is that companies such as yours that treat its customers in such a cavalier fashion will ultimately fail because the customer now has real choice. I now have another example to quote in my seminars...

Total silence again for two more days. And then surprise surprise, not one, but three eMails pop into my inbox from Callserve's customer support. The first is a computer generated eMail (I think):

Dear brian Your account has been adjusted to reflect your recent request. Please see below for transaction details.   16.3405 GBP  Balance correction

(Thinks: how many minutes of online phone time can you get for .05 of a penny?)

A minute later, a Jonathan Featherstone sends me anothe eMail:

Thank you for your enquiry. To fix the problem please go to the follwoing website to download and then install a new version of our software. www.uaecaller.com/callserve

Err.. thanks guys, but by going to the "follwoing" site is what started this all off in the first place.

10 more nail-biting minutes pass... Jonathan Featherstone writes again (just in case I am too thick to have comprehended the earlier eMail generated by their computer?)

 have also reactivated your account with a balance of £16.34 Kind regards

Ah, so they have thought better of crediting me with an extra .05 pence as compensation? Well, never mind. At least they have seen the error of their ways; and I take this as an apology from the mighty Callserve.

I mean, I still won't be recommending them to my friends (so they can keep their $5 reward) but perhaps their service might come in useful one day - if I can think of anyone I want to ring overseas who is not yet on skype / yahoo / MSN / etc - just as long as I do so within 6 months

24th November 2010 further update:

Oh dear - they still don't get it do they???

Further update on 8th April 2011

I tried using callserve again this week only to find that yet again my credit of over sixteen pounds has been reduced to zero by those thieving good for nothings at Callserve. I wrote once again to thier customer "service" department referring to my previous conversations with them.

Why am I not surprised that I have - after five days - received no answer from them.

Let me reiterate my earlier comments - that Callserve deserve to fail in today's internet world. Any organisation which treats its customers in such a disgusting, dishonest and downright shoddy fashion should be given the cold shoulder. I, for one, will be an evangelist for telling as many people as I possibly can to steer well away from these shysters!